Dirty

Saw this car parked near our place the other day.

If you slapped me, would I slap you back?

I was walking to the subway after work today, and heard this small voice say ‘hello’. I looked over, and noticed this little boy in the back seat of a car. At first I got nervous, and wondered if he was calling for help, but then I saw his big sister in the front seat on the cell phone. He was eating a lollipop, and smiled and waved at me. So cute. I think that all the news this last week (about John Mark Karr suspected of killing JonBenet Ramsey, and the girl Natascha Kampusch who just escaped after being kept prisoner in a man’s house for eight years) has done a number on my head. It also made me think about this one time when I was working in a record store, I was helping this father and son. This store, Musica, allowed people to listen to CD’s before they bought them. The sucky thing was that employees would have to stand behind these mini counters, and play the CD for people – they weren’t allowed to do it on their own. So I was helping this man and his little boy one day, and as I skipped from one track to the next, the boy made some comment about not liking the track. The father proceeded to slap the boy across his face. It was insane. It came out of nowhere, and it was loud. Like a loud smacking sound. I was stunned. I didn’t know what to do. I just stood there. And then I think at some stage my manager came over, and told me to go stack some CD’s, at which point she took over. For ages I felt guilty, like I should have done something or said something. I even imagined slapping the father back. But in these moments, it’s sometimes impossible to do or say what you’re feeling. Even for someone as confrontational as me.

The cover of my book is the color of hot pink lava

I started a new job 2 weeks ago, and the time has just flown by. I am still at the stage where everything is new, and I’m just trying to get a handle on it all, so that I can get the job done. I’m sure in a month’s time I’ll feel differently, and will know my way around much better – but for now I feel like an idiot. Having said all that, I do like the job, my boss and the people I work with. The commute requires that I take the subway to the east bay, and I made a big change in the route I walk. Instead of down Powell, I now walk to Montgomery. By doing this, I avoid being bombarded by all the homeless along Powell who are begging for money, and all the tourists that block the walkways. I now walk along quiet streets, that don’t have that many people. I see the beautiful statue outside Notre Dame de Victoires, and that always makes me smile. And on most mornings Max has gotten up to commute with me. We sit in silence, holding hands and trying to wake up. It’s a magical feeling. Then I get off the train in Oakland, and walk a few blocks to my office. This walk is also free of crowds, and I see all the new stores I will likely become familiar with over time. I discovered a great vegan Vietnamese place for lunch nearby, and the café downstairs sells these great morning bars that are wheat, sugar and dairy free.

After work, I have been coming home, changing, and heading straight for the gym. I find that if I waiver from this routine, it’s impossible to work out. Of course this isn’t ideal if I want a social life, but as always my health is priority. And sometimes this means missing out on certain things. I obviously didn’t get to go to the gym while I was in Japan and New York, but I walked so much that it probably evened out in the wash. I carried my pedometer with me, and most days I averaged walking 5 miles. One day in Japan we walked over 8 miles, but that was an extreme.

Yesterday was my first day back in the studio since June. I spent a full day there, putting up projects I did in New York, and sorting through papers and supplies I bought. There was an art supply/stationery store in Tokyo, called Itoya, that has 7 floors. I spent a lot of money there. Pens, stickers, paper, notebooks, white out, markers… It was insane. Max was actually afraid when we walked in and saw how amazing it was. I also spent some money at Printed Matter in Chelsea. Books and t-shirts. Things I will cherish forever, for sure.

I made the mock-up for a book I’m doing for a show. It’s an Art Ecology project, put together by the lovely Amber Hasselbring. Her site explains that “the goal of our efforts is to draw attention to the role of nature in contemporary life.” How beautiful is that? I love making books. I really should take a book making class and learn how to make them myself. This one is very low tech, and Kinkos is putting it together for me. But I’m still excited to see how it turns out.

And now it is Sunday, and nighttime is coming. I hate Sunday nights, and always have. I get the Sunday Night Blues pretty bad sometimes, and I feel that I will have to fight that off tonight. Thank God for Entourage.

We’re the same

Tonight I went to see a play at Intersection with Megan and Deborah. Thanks fo the excellent company ladies!

If you are in San Francisco this weekend, I can’t stress enough how amazing and cool this production is. It’s the last weekend, and totally worth seeing. We all walked out astounded. It incorporated dance, music, singing, video, performance and sound. The subject matter is very close to my heart, and the way in which it was presented was so creative and original. During so many moments of the piece, I was blown away by how much it reminded me of work I’ve done over the years. It felt like looking in a mirror, or seeing my own thoughts spoken back to me. I would really like to get in touch with the woman who created this project, so if anyone knows Erika Shuch, please put us in touch.

“ORBIT (notes from the edge of forever) is a unique dance theatre project exploring the search for extra-terrestrial life, concepts of faith and belief, and the human need for contact and connection with the universe. Don’t miss the chance to see a rare performance by Shuch in this exciting new project.”

Remember me

The workshop at The Kitchen forced 16 of us together. 16 people from places as far as Peru and Croatia, Atlanta and Toronto, Portland and Tucson. We spent all day everyday together. And as quickly as we came together, so too were we split apart. I have to be careful, and remember everything. I don’t want to forget. And I don’t want to be forgotten. I miss them all already, and I’m trying to keep the vibe that was created there in my heart. Spending three weeks talking about and making art together was a gift.

One day we lost our DSL connection, and a nearby school offered us one of their classrooms, so that a visiting artist could give his online lecture. This sign was taped to the back of the door.

Back in action

After an amazing experience in New York City, I am back home. This journey has led me to realize this – that I consider San Francisco home – and for that I am so grateful. Despite the sweltering heat, and lack of sleep, I had an amazing time. The experience of working so closely with Harrell Fletcher was invaluable. I met so many amazing people, who I will keep close to my heart, and whom I hope to collaborate on projects with in the future.

There is lots more to come on the blog about this trip, including videos and photo albums.

For now, I will say that I love the cold summer days here, and I am enjoying my new job. I have suddenly moved from the chaos of the artworld, into a steady 9-5 routine. Somehow, it is exactly what I need right now.

One of the amazing people I worked with: Jen Delos Reyes

Ten Things about the Workshop in NYC

1. The weather is awful. I think my sweat is sweating. Most days I walk out and feel like I’m wading through a huge bowl of pea soup. It’s so gross. I will never complain about the cold summers in San Francisco again.

2. The awesome people I have met through doing this workshop. Artists with amazing work, amazing ideas, and amazing personalities. I am laughing a lot.

3. The good food. There is a vegan chef making all our meals, and each day is a new amazing surprise. I was so happy to find that I am not the only one in the group who doesn’t eat dairy, wheat or sugar. I feel blessed.

4. I miss my husband. Max is sending me beautiful emails, and checking in via phone each day. But these are all surrogates for the real thing. I cant wait to see him again.

5. Chelsea has a lot of dogs. This neighborhood is full of people who love their canines, and treat them well. I’ve seen a lot of steaming poo being picked up, and during a heat wave like this – it’s even more admirable. I don’t know if I would have it in me.

6. Seeing my best friends and family regularly is such a treat. Jose and Ben are both finding time to hang with me in between my crazy class schedule, which feels like asking for a lot. But they have helped to make it work. I will miss them all so much when I go back.

7. Printed Matter. I feel confident in saying that I could easily spend every last drop of my savings in this bookstore. It is truly a gem.

8. Smart Water. Thank you for sponsoring this workshop. I have been drinking unlimited bottles of this heavenly nectar each day, and never grow tired of it.

9. The visiting artists who have come to speak at The Kitchen have been amazing. Emily Jacir, Mierle Ukeles Laderman, Allan McCoullough. The list is long, and they have all been so inspiring. New York is such a whore that way – artists everywhere!

10. Harrell Fletcher is the most successful project manager ever. I have NEVER seen anyone delegate this successfully before.

Despite what everyone thought – our wardrobe choice last week was purely coincidental. Circular Energy IS Real!

For everyone who has emailed or called to ask when I’ll be posting to the blog again – I apologize. This workshop is just taking up most of the day. There is an extensive site that keeps track of our projects and progress. You can view this here to see what’s going on.